Satisfaction And Destruction
I was a god, slightly manic, but still a creator none-the less.
I built complex lego cities as a child, along with buildings and vehicles for the little lego-men to live in. Just as my worlds were nearing completion I would get the urge to start over and in a split second decision I would literally throw the entire set of creations at my wall.
Legos raining down from the heavens, I destroyed hours worth of work in seconds.
Honestly this didn’t bother me at all.
In fact it was the opposite. I would feel satisfaction in the process of creating, and I found energy through destruction.
Energy is strange because sometimes spending it is the best way to create it.
Take writing for example. Right now writing is hard. It’s taking a lot of my energy and I’ve written 30 things you won’t see because I’ve deleted it all and it’s wasted. But after expending energy for awhile I suddenly reach a tipping point and high from making a break-through on a sentence or paragraph and suddenly my energy swells until I’m on auto-pilot pumping out sentences and paragraphs and finding my flow.
I guess you just have to know the balance of always spending enough energy to get the reward. It’s always an investment. Something you need to see the ROI on.
Just like normal investments we look for shortcuts instead of building sustaining returns. Caffeine and addictions are short distractions to sustaining ability. And lots of things we think give it to us really just drains it in the long run.
I’m energetic when I have goals and when I finish them. I’m energetic when I am building things. Breaking things. Investing my energy into something the will give me more of it.
The Uni-bomber believed that everyone needs goals in three areas of their lives to feel energy and satisfied. It’s an interesting insight. Here’s the idea.
1 . You need goals which you can accomplish quickly. These are weekly tasks like hitting the gym or aceing the test. These build short bursts of energetic momentum.
2. Medium goals which you can work to achieve: Like graduating, getting the job, or hitting your yearly target. These are gratifying and take more energy to achieve.
4. Long term goals you’ll never fully reach: This is the never ending quest for knowledge, the forever improvement, the big dream you need to shoot for. You can never quench this and that’s why you’ll always have energy to go after it.
This is how you live with energy and satisfaction.
Creating goals and reaching them, then burning it all down to start anew and on to something bigger.